Calisthenics 1, Week 1

Class exercise 8/25/11

The Hallway Entrance to my Apartment

A contingent affair of flavorings
inaugurated day by day. Diet fads
abruptly greet the twisting doorknob
as lies of burnt calories circulate.

Intermittently chemicals release from
Bath & BodyWork's country green egg
falsly demising the term "fresh" linen.

Ocassionaly, ceramic piles of loathsome
argument grind unsettled debri facilitated
by cats and rats; overbearing recycled air.

Rising temperament expend as chilled air
gratifies my roommate.

Response 1, Week 1

For: Blackened Talapia Over a bed of Braised Carrots Celery

Hello David,

I did not skip the introduction because you seem pretty fun to read.Anyway I enjoyed your poem. I liked the energetic imagery drawing illustrations to the thoughts of my mind.The punctuation mechanics were a little much for me when it came to the -- . I can't think of a valid discernment other than too much.

I think lines 12-14 could be condensed a little with the tree/leaves descriptions.
Maybe like:
Brown with age they crunch like cockroaches;
flourishing life in the returning spring
raising a cacophony remember...
But I do not know it is just a suggestion.

"time doesn't just end at the junction of seconds;instead, it flickers endlessly both backwards and forwards and at the most inconvenient times, it plucks the chords tied to my senses in the most painful way possible"

AND

"the husk of shoes that have been stripped soleless"

are probably my favorite parts of your piece I just love their descriptive use.

Well those were just a few thoughts :)

Junkyard Quote 4, Week 1

"paralyzed by a clash between two dominant factions"

-Your Morning Jolt: Georgia Democrats discover power of the word 'No'

AJC News

By: Jgalloway

I wrote this down from last Thursday's News. The more I read newspapers the more they start to look like extended poems. The way the writer is particular in his/her choice of words to condense the story but still relay the message. I like how powerful the line sounds.

Paralyzed, clash, and dominant are quite effectual words especially when it comes to politics.

Free Entry 1, Week 1

Leo

Guised shades of gray birth down the slivered

left ear executing at the tail.

Bristled face beings guide the

gimp ulna of an abusive ex boyfriend.

Capering corners like YouTube’s:

“ Little Cute Lamb!”

A rumbling throat of joy.

Serpentine charm & maniacal plans of

treat-less dogs, punished toilet

paper, and shredded upholstery.

Spastic coiled kicks of bedding

.... Blah

This is just thought up characteristics of my cat. I want to describe him from my voice and perspective. I don’t want: I have a gray cat that has a missing piece of his ear and a forgotten once fractured leg. I want to describe his sneaky personality and his odd behavior. I would like to incorporate his desire to go toilet bowl scuba diving, obsession of ice cubes, fascination of pens, and his girly sounding squeak of a voice. He is also a peace maker with cats who are hesitant to encounter one another… perhaps a ladies man because he has only met three female cats that hated cats. It would be nice if I knew how to say that in words? Ideas?

Junkyard Quote 3, Week 1

"salty worm on concrete"

A helplessly dry feeling.

Defeated and lifelessly insignificant.

Unattractive and small.

That's what a shitty mood must feel like.

OR

An american robins treat.

A survival of the fittest match, owned... in a gamers world "pwned."

Good morning world.

Junkyard Quote 2, Week 1

"that with pulse of fire"

An assorment of meaning could be drawn from this quote. A pulse with fire makes me think of passion... he was pulsing with fire at the thought of her (the loved one.) It could mean anger... anger burst from the burrow of her stomach circulating with pulse of fire... Or perhaps it could mean excitement : the raging sound of excitement set pulse of fire through the body.

Junkyard Quote 1, Week 1

"I myself am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions."

— Augusten Burroughs (Magical Thinking: True Stories)

I never actually read this book but I have read parts of another one of his books. I have always had an attachment to this quote from the first moment I read it. I guess I feel like I relate.

I love how this quote is worded "flaws, stitched together with good intentions." Combining flaws to good intentions is just a more fascinating way to describe human characteristics.

No one is perfect but the strive to be is what counts. I feel like as a human being there is an understanding of imperfection but whatever those imperfections may be our actions are intended for well. This may not be the case for everyone but its definitely my hopes. Anyone who goals to intentionally harm or destruct someone/something is sickening. For me forgiveness can be justified to someone who genuinely means well but not so much for someone with cruel intentions.